Yes, it’s totally ok to break up over the holidays

The holidays are full of joy, love, and laughter . . . until they aren’t. While this time of year can be lovely, it can also be stressful on families, friends, and especially significant others.

Buying gifts, making plans to visit loved ones, and compromising on holiday traditions can take their toll on a relationship. This stress is absolutely normal, but what if your love life was already tense before the holidays began or has suddenly taken a turn for the worse?

November is usually designated as a “breakup season” to avoid a holiday separation, but sometimes the timing doesn’t work out in your favor. Is it totally heartless to end things before the new year? Don’t come for me in the comments, but I don’t think so. In fact, it might be even more heartless to stay together. If you’re considering a holiday breakup, it can seem daunting or damn near impossible to say “it’s over,” but it’s doable. There are a lot of factors to consider during this season of love and giving, but your happiness, health, and authenticity should come first.

If you’ve already asked yourself the necessary questions and decided to break up, here’s what you should keep in mind.

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Sooner is better than later

Once you’ve recognized that your relationship is over, it’s time to end things. It’s not fair to either of you to continue unhappily, especially if you’ve made up your mind. The longer you wait, the more painful and drawn out a breakup can become, especially during this time of year.

Stay true to your feelings

Relationships can end up being romanticized around the holidays, so once you’ve made up your mind, stick to your guns. It sucks to be strung along, as anyone who’s experienced that will tell you. If you’ve decided to commit to a holiday breakup, be confident in your decision and don’t take a festive time of year to go back and forth.

You’ll have time to recover

The lucky thing about a holiday breakup (if there is such a thing) is that this season usually comes with time off. Hopefully, you’ll each spend time with family or friends and can recover separately. You can take your break, away from the office, to wallow and maintain some distance. It’s incredible what a little time apart can do to heal wounds and help the heart move on.

The new year made is for new beginnings

The ultimate goal? Walking into the new year with a clean slate. The very definition of “new year, new you” is a fresh start come Jan. 1. This is a time for reflection. As painful as a breakup can be, you don’t need to carry any baggage of the year before with you.

 

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